Received any good customer service lately?  It certainly is hard to come by these days. But it does exist – and when you experience it, you can immediately tell the difference from the professionals and those who just don’t have the talent.  Don’t be lulled into thinking that good customer service just happens. Companies that have exceptional customer service train their employees to be superior customer service agents. As the Assistant Chief Executive Officer of your household, you can move up from being a mediocre disciplinarian of your children to an outstanding disciplinarian by implementing the following techniques that CEOs of major corporations utilize. Here they are:

  1. Set Goals: Don’t just assume your child knows how to behave, let him know what you expect of him.
    “I want you to be in bed by 9:00.”
    “I want your homework completed before you get on the computer.”
    “I want you to find other ways than hitting to let your younger brother know that you’re angry with him.”
    When setting goals for your child, limit goals to no more than two or three. Too many goals can be overwhelming and reduce how successful your child will be in accomplishing his goals.
  1. Reward Accomplishments: When your child performs a desired goal or even attempts to accomplish a desired goal, reward him. Give him a smile, a pat on the back, or a verbal compliment.“I see you finished your homework before getting on the computer. You are being very responsible.”Or, try one of the most effective reward systems around—the star chart system.  Write your child’s name on a sheet of paper.  Whenever he accomplishes an established goal, give him a star on his chart.  When he receives 10 stars, give him a treat, buy a new toy or take him somewhere special. Letting him join in on deciding what the reward will be can be even more effective in helping him strive for his goals.
  1. Provide Feedback: Make certain your child knows when he has accomplished his goals. This can be done by selecting from the suggestions mentioned above in step 2. Your child will also need to be reminded when he is not achieving his goals and when he needs improvement. Feedback needn’t be harsh; it merely needs to be consistent. If penalties are needed, get in the habit of using methods that avoid corporal punishment. As an alternative, remove desired privileges such as computer use for a period of time, phone use, electronic game use, special outings or other desired activities.  Also, try time-outs; the time should be commensurate with the child’s age. With all forms of penalties, avoid expressing anger or shouting. Always try to remain calm when implementing penalties. This helps prevent unnecessary or unrestrained lashing out with your tongue or hands.
  1. Continue your Program: It’s easy to get bored with alternative discipline methods that avoid hitting and shouting. You might get tired of returning to the star chart to put up stars. You may become restless in coming up with ideas for rewards or penalties. Don’t give up. Research parenting sites online for lists of rewards and penalties for your specific child’s age. Stay motivated with the star chart system by remembering that when you cease taking the time to put up stars, you often end up having to spend your time resolving discipline offenses instead. Rewards encourage good behavior–without a doubt. So keep it up!

Now, the next time you make a phone call and receive a real live person at the other end who responds with impeccable courtesy and manners, you know why: because you do the same in your own corporate office.

Please share your tips and suggestions in the comments section below. 🙂



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63 replies on “4 Steps to Becoming an Outstanding Assistant CEO of Your Household”

    Aamir Hussain sheikh
    October 16, 2015 at 5:55 am

    Very nice thinking. …absolutely a mark of genius if a parent delivers like that way

    • October 17, 2015 at 3:03 am

      Jazakalakhair for your kind words. Your Sister in Islam, Grandma Jeddah

    • October 17, 2015 at 3:06 am

      Barakalafik wa Jazakalakhair for your taking the time to comment. Your Sister in Islam, Grandma Jeddah

    Riyaz Shaikh
    October 16, 2015 at 4:57 pm

    Masha Allah good initiative. Jazak Allah Khair…We should further see the following sensitive areas missing from us like:
    1. Mannerism & Character building (personality development)
    2. Communication skill
    3. Patriotism
    4. Leadership skill

    • October 17, 2015 at 3:07 am

      Barakalafik wa Jazakalakhair for your taking the time to comment. Your Sister in Islam, Grandma Jeddah

    October 16, 2015 at 6:07 pm

    Amazing Article. Thank you very much, I don’t have kids yet, but I benefited alot for the future. Thank you!

    • October 17, 2015 at 3:09 am

      You are more than welcome wa Jazakalakhair.

        October 18, 2015 at 5:12 am

        Jazakillah khair for useful tips

    October 16, 2015 at 6:16 pm

    It is a welcome methods, we appreciates your great idea, may Allah SWA rewards you abundantly

    • October 17, 2015 at 3:13 am

      Thank you for your kind comments. Jazakalakhair. Your Sister in Islam, Grandma Jeddah

    October 16, 2015 at 6:38 pm

    Jazakillah jedda. Am the hitting and shouting type , I hope these 4 steps work in shaaAllah.

    • October 17, 2015 at 3:10 am

      Wa Jazak and Barakalafik. Your Sister in Islam, Grandma Jeddah

    October 17, 2015 at 12:13 am

    The four steps seems simple to follow in an ideal situation where the child is submissive but some are recalcitrant to correction of which you would be left with no option than to employ a corporal punishment. If there is any other ways aside corpora punishment on stubborn children please keep me posted. Good parenting i have come to know is the only way of building a good society only if we can rid of our children excesses at early age. You’re doing an amazing job thank you.

    • October 17, 2015 at 3:17 am

      Assalamu Alaikum Sister Haruna, when you get time, please visit my site and also read my free ebooks. Insha’Allah, you will find that sometimes there are reasons why certain children are stubborn. Even in these cases, gentleness can be a solution. Jazakalakhair for your kind comments. Your Sister in Islam, Grandma Jeddah

    October 17, 2015 at 1:56 am

    Maashaallah.. Very useful.

    October 17, 2015 at 2:08 am

    alhamdulillah! that was few steps and seems more easy and positive ways to follow. no children yet, but i guess it can applicable to other child in the family. thank you real much 🙂

  • October 17, 2015 at 3:19 am

    You are more than welcome, Sister Eliz. Jazakalakhair.

    Your Sister in Islam, Grandma Jeddah

    October 17, 2015 at 8:32 am

    Jazakillahu kheiran for the beautiful tips on parenting….am the kind of mother who shouts a lot if the child does not obey my instructions. Am also used to corporal punishment.I really hope and pray to ALLAH Subhaanahu wataala that i will be able to follow the above 4 steps in order to improve my relationship with my children.

    October 17, 2015 at 3:27 pm

    thank you so much for the nice tips Jedda, jazaakillahu khayran. barakAllah feeling ❤️❤️❤️
    Would you mind to put some hadith for the basis, that would be perfect. Thank you Jedda.

    October 17, 2015 at 5:58 pm

    Beautiful teaching. My children are grown. What do you have for them?

    • October 21, 2015 at 3:46 am

      Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah Wa Barakatu Sister Ameena. I would suggest, patience, being a good example, and dua.

  • f.shabnakhan@gmail.comthi'
    October 18, 2015 at 1:48 am

    This is extremely great as our society is in dire need of creating a diciplined Muslim generation. Though our parents struggle to grow up their children to a better standard unfortunately many of them lack in parenting.But I also consider as well as parents teachers too play a vital role in children’s better future. And these guidelines must be applied for them as well. Jazakalla kair for grandma Jeddah for providing us wonderful guidlines

    • October 21, 2015 at 3:50 am

      Jazakalakhair for your kind words. I agree with your points. Barakalafik.

    October 18, 2015 at 2:33 am

    Jazakhallah sister for your advice, I have a three and one year old Alhamdullillah. I use all four of your techniques already and have learnt it does work. I use a gold star for teeth brushing etc. However my three year old is very stubborn .

    • October 21, 2015 at 3:48 am

      May Allah continue to bless you with success. Make dua often for Allah to make things easy for you with your difficult 3-year old.

    October 18, 2015 at 2:53 am

    Barakallahu fiki fi dunya wa’l akhiro(amen)

    AAMIR Bashir
    October 18, 2015 at 2:54 am

    wonderful. we thank you for all this worthy stuff.hope more n new.

    October 18, 2015 at 4:23 am

    Masha Allah i need some more articles

    October 18, 2015 at 5:28 am

    Some say that ‘time-outs’ are not that effective as the child in question may feel isolated or rejected instead of pondering on his or her misbehavior. So, i would like to know if it’s true?

    • October 21, 2015 at 4:32 am

      Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah Wa Barakatu, You bring up a good point. I have heard this as well.It is likely that the child might feel isolated or rejected instead of pondering on his misbehavior. Probably for this reason, time-outs are not meant to be for extensive periods of time. It has been suggested that for for every year in age give one minute of time out. It’s simply an alternative way of letting your child know he’s done wrong without hitting or shouting at him.
      One of the good things about time out is that it also gives the parent a moment to calm down. This can be a key to avoiding child abuse as well as avoiding disciplining with anger. Time out, as well as other methods mentioned above are merely methods to manage your child’s behavior without hitting and shouting. And if you read about the way the Prophet (saw) managed children around him, he avoided hitting and shouting and was very kind and patient. Jazakalakhair

    October 18, 2015 at 5:31 am

    JazakAllah for sharing such beautiful guidance.

    October 18, 2015 at 7:33 am

    Jazakillahu khairan Grandma Jeddah. u r doing a great job masha Allah. I have read your book ‘ disciplining without disrespecting ‘ and found it useful. just that in my environment, such is not the practice. but I agree your method is the best and will really try to adopt it. I will have to educate the people around me who will think I am ‘ spoiling’ the child.

    October 18, 2015 at 8:16 am

    Jazak Allaha khair for sharing this such an helpful article in sha ALLAHA with Allaha’s will i will be following this eagirly to diliver my job as a mother . I am sure this will bring up immense change in to my kids and aswell as in me .

    • October 21, 2015 at 3:57 am

      Wa Iyyak. May Allah The Most High bless you with success.

    Abdullah MAbubakar
    October 18, 2015 at 8:46 am

    Jazakumullahu bi khair, this is really educating especially for people like us “new fathers to be” we are looking forward to see more educating articles like this that will help Us in raising a well mannered Children, May Allah Set reward U abundantly and guide U in your day today endeavours, Wassalamu alaikum.

    • October 21, 2015 at 4:00 am

      Wa Iyyak. Please visit my website for a treasure full of effective tips and help on raising children. Barakalafik.

    October 18, 2015 at 9:14 am

    yeah good steps to teach children but parents should have patience while doing this …

    • October 21, 2015 at 4:01 am

      You are very true, Sister Zainab. Patience is important. Jazakalakhair.

    October 18, 2015 at 9:27 am

    JazakAllah for such a beautiful post. I have seen some parents being so irresponsible and expecting a lot from their little kids. I think parents need advice as simple as this one to ensure that they are atleast doing minimal.
    I think parents need to understand that kids cannot be raised without giving them proper attention. Parents are doing whatever they want and they don’t care about their kid’s routines or likes/dislikes ,especially younger parents.

    • October 21, 2015 at 3:44 am

      Assalamu Alaikium Wa Rahmatullah Wa Barakatu. Masha’Allah, I agree with you totally. Jazakalakhair.

    Jafaru Laalang
    October 18, 2015 at 10:02 am

    Jazakallah very useful

    October 18, 2015 at 12:51 pm

    Bravo, très instructif !!

    October 18, 2015 at 1:05 pm

    A good read. Thank you.

    October 18, 2015 at 3:47 pm

    Thanks so much for this article. I will put this to practise. In Africa we are used to shouting and lashing. And its not helping matters at all. Will try this and give you feedback

    • October 21, 2015 at 4:34 am

      Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah Wa Barakatu Sister Abidat, May Allah The Most High bless you with success.

    October 19, 2015 at 12:48 pm

    Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu. I prefer attachment parenting. It’s way too better. It’s about respecting kids, its about empathy, its about cooperation instead of demanding to obey parents. Allah subhanu wa ta’ala does not punish kids until they reach puberty, why should we?

    • October 21, 2015 at 4:43 am

      Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah Wa Barakatu, I agree with you totally. attachment parenting is an excellent way to manage children’s behavior. I think the above methods of no hitting and shouting and Attachment Parenting go hand-in-hand. You can find more on Attachment Parenting from Sister Karen Jone’s site. Here is an article and more information on her site: Jazakalakhair Wa Barakalafik.

    October 19, 2015 at 12:53 pm
    • October 21, 2015 at 4:51 am

      Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah Wa Barakatu, Thank you for sharing the information on Punished by rewards. I had been very interested in that subject. There are some very interesting points brought out in the article. I think in general, to some degree we all strive for things because we desire rewards. People often work because they desire the reward of getting a paycheck. We struggle hard in this life because we desire the reward of Jannah. May Allah The Most High guide us all to what is most pleasing to Him. Jazakalakhair for taking the time to write.
      Your Sister in Islam,
      Grandma Jeddah

    Ali osman
    October 23, 2015 at 6:49 am

    JazakAllahu kheiran. Very informative and beneficial.

  • October 25, 2015 at 2:59 am

    Wa Iyyak.

    November 19, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    Assalamu Alaikun, i have 4 boys .1 is 5yrs old,while the three boys are triplet 3yrs old. waooo. they could be very naughty at times. they always follow the footstep of their elder brother . i keep shouting and spanking before the senior boy could adjust. i will try nd use ur method i belive it will be helpfull.