How should parents pray for their children?

Dua’ is the weapon of the Muslims. It is the right of the children that their parents pray for them even before they are born. Parents even make dua’ when they have relations. And Allah describes the righteous worshippers of himself as making the dua’,

"Our Lord! Bestow on us from our wives and our offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes." [1]

 This was the way of the prophets. We find Prophet Zakariya (عَلَيْهِ السَّلاَمُ) praying,

 "O my Lord! Grant me from You, a good offspring. You are indeed the All-Hearer of invocation."[2]

 Allah answered his prayer saying,

And (made him) sympathetic to men as a mercy (or a grant) from Us, and pure from sins (i.e. Yahya (John)) and he was righteous.[3]

 So as parents we should make sincere dua’ for righteous children. A dua’ which comes from the bottom of our heart, with certainty that our dua’ will be answered. Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said,

“Call upon Allah with certainty that he will answer you. Know that Allah will not answer the supplication of a heart that is heedless and careless.”[4]

When we make dua’ for righteous children, it is not only taking the dua’ from the Qur’an or the Sunnah, and simply repeating it ritualistically. It is reflecting on the dua’ and saying it with our hearts and souls. Furthermore, sincere dua’ will only be accepted from the righteous. Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) as saying,

“0 people, Allah is Good and He therefore, accepts only that which is good. And Allah commanded the believers as He commanded the Messengers by saying:

" O Messengers, eat of the good things, and do good deeds; verily I am aware of what you do,"[5] 

And He said: ' 0 those who believe, eat of the good things that We gave you." [6]

He then made a mention of a person who travels widely, his hair dishevelled and covered with dust. He lifts his hand towards the sky (and thus makes the supplication):" O Lord,0 Lord," whereas his diet is unlawful, his drink is unlawful, and his clothes are unlawful and his nourishment is unlawful. How can then his supplication be accepted?”[7]

When we talk about making sincere dua’, we must also have the necessary conditions that are needed for a dua’ to be accepted, so that we can fulfill them as much as we can. We must try to chose the optimum times for dua’ and also make sure other conditions are fulfilled.

Another aspect of dua’ is by choosing the right names for our children. By choosing the names of righteous of the generations before us, becomes a kind of dua’ for our children. Also if we chose the names which have good meanings, this is also a form of taking a good omen out of them omen which is permitted. Prophet (ﷺ) permitted this element of omen taking when he forbade all others. So choose good names for your children, and not traditional, tribal or national names, names of good meanings. The Prophet (ﷺ) recommended Abdullah and Abdur Rahma. Also, children could be named after the Sahaba and when your child asks what their name means, you are able to tell them something good, either in its meaning or about the Sahaba you named your child after.

References:

[1] [Qur’an 25:74]

[2] [Qur’an 3:38]

[3] [Qur’an 19:13]

[4] [Sunan At-Tirmidhi 3479]

[5] [Qur’an 23:51]

[6] [Qur’an 2:172]

[7] [Sahih Muslim 1015]